JOKES - Some hamsap jokes

(1) DON'T LOOK AT NAKED LADY
Boy 1: Why do you run from a naked lady?
Boy 2: Becos my mum said that if I look at a naked lady,
I'll turn into stone.* *
A part of me is getting hard already!

(2) NAMES OF WIVES
A malay man had 4 wives, and he called his...
4th wife..... baby doll
3rd wife.....china doll
2nd wife.....barbie doll
1st wife..... panadol !

(3) HOW INDIA GOT ITS NAME
This is how India got its name.....
The king was having sex with his mistress while thinking a
name of his
country and his mistress ask him* *
'In Dear?'...

(4) RESEARCH FINDING
Research shows men are fatter than women because
every-night men get fresh
milk & 2 big papayas while women only get 1 banana, 2
peanuts & 1 tea-spoon
of starch!

(5) ARAB MAN
An arab was being interviewed at a US checkpoint.* *
'Your name pls'?
'Abdul Aziz '
'Sex? '
'Six times a week!! '
'No, no, I mean male or female! '
'Doesn't matters, sometimes even camel !'

(6) SERVICE
Sex is like a restaurant.
Sometimes you get full satisfactory service and sometimes
you have to be
satisfied with self-service'

(7) HAPPY MAN
What makes a happy man?
Daughter on the cover of cosmo.
Son on the cover of sports illustrated.
Mistress on the cover of playboy and...* *
Wife on the cover of 'missing persons'

(8) SWIMSUIT
Why was the 2-piece swimsuit invented?
To separate the HAIRY section from the DAIRY section.*

(9) GOOD AMBITION
Teacher: What do you want to become?
Little Johnny: Doctor !!
Teacher: Why?
Little Johnny: Coz its the only profession where u can tell
a woman to take
off her clothes and ask her husband to pay for it.

(10) DENTIST
Woman complaining to dentist: 'It's so painful,
I'll rather have a baby than
have a tooth removed.'
Dentist: 'Make up your mind soon, I'll adjust the
chair accordingly. '

(11) VIRGIN
Old lady, 85, a virgin, about to die. wanted her tombstone
to read :* *
BORN A VIRGIN, LIVED A VIRGIN, DIED A VIRGIN.
The engraver shortened it to: ' RETURNED UNOPENED


(12) OLD MAN AND YOUNG GIRL
75 yr old man got married to a 15 yr girl.
On their first night both were crying - why???
Coz she didn't know anything and he had forgotten
everything.